What I mean by “Self-censorship” is not writing the whole truth and nothing but the truth in your journals. Sometimes it is really hard to dig deep and be completely honest. But if you can’t do that in your own journal, where can you do it?

Have you ever written a heart wrenching entry that was cathartic to have written out, but then everytime you open your journal you see it and it sends a painful memory back to you? You may then find yourself either not wanting to use that journal or not wanting to write such entries down, which is not helpful at all. You may even be tempted to rip the entry out, burn it, throw it away. Which is fine, if you really want to do that. I hate ripping pages out of my journal though. My journal is me- the good, the bad, and the ugly. Sometimes we need to be raw and ugly in order to find the beauty in our lives.

Life is not always peachy and sometimes you just need to vent. Writing it out in your journal can help get all those emotions out safely and in a constructive way. We also may censor ourselves in our journals because we are often taught to not express our emotions or opinions-keep everything “pleasant”. Your journal is the place to write down your honest thoughts at that moment, even if that changes in the next moment.

Below are some visuals from my own journal and how I dealt with self-censorship. I wrote all my angst out in my journal…but after I dealt with the emotions and the situation passed, I didn’t want to see it anymore. So, I covered it up! It’s not beautiful, but it served its purpose. I needed to write what was inside of my head, but I didn’t want to see it everytime I opened my journal.

On the spread above I actually sewed pieces of scrap fabric to my journal page, covering up my entry. I know what’s under there…but I don’t need to see it anymore. I liked how the sewn-in fabric added more character to my already bulging journal.

This spread above you can see the thread stitches poking through. I also covered up some of the writing with pencil scribbles and also glued on another scrap piece of dark fabric.

If you can be honest with yourself in your journal, you may feel better afterwards. Or if not totally better, at least lighter and with more clarity.

Other cover-up tips:

+ Staple the pages together- this is good if one day you do want to go back and read the entry. You just need to get the staples out!
+ Glue the pages together
+ Glue a decorative piece of paper on top
+ Paint, scribble, doodle on top of the entry
+ Write on a separate sheet of paper. If you want to put it in your journal, you can by stapling it in, paperclipping, or by gluing an envelope and sticking the paper in there. If you don’t want to keep it in your journal, toss it, burn it, shred it up!

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One of the greatest things in the world is to train ourselves to see beauty in the commonplace. ~Charles Hawthorne

The point of having a journal is to record your thoughts and events. It is easy to fall into the trap of writing things out like an itinerary of events. For example: Today I woke up and ate breakfast before I had to get ready for the day. I then got dressed and left the house.

Yes, that definitely records what happened that day, but if you stop and really think about the details and write them out, your entries will be so more richer. Here is an alternative to the above example:

I woke up around 5:30 am and the world was so still. When I let Foggy out, there was snow on the ground and on the fence. The snow seemed to glow in the morning’s darkness. And inside the house, all was quiet. The world felt like it was still asleep.

When I read that entry, my memory comes to a sharp focus on that moment, the morning of the day my son was born. If I had just written the first example, I don’t think I would remember that stillness of that January morning. It brings it all back to me. Even the way the light came in through the kitchen window.

Try writing a journal entry this way. The easiest way is to do it in the present tense. Sit on a bench outside in a park during your lunch break. Describe what you see, what you hear, what you smell. Remember the “wh” questions you learned to ask in your high school writing class- who, what, when, where, why, and how. Get it down. You are painting a picture with words.

Artist Erin Kenepp is chronicaling a whole year of her life with a visual journal entry for every day. It is really quite amazing.

page from Erin Kenepp’s visual journal

I love this visual journal entry that she was so generous to share here. The marriage between the richness of her words and the simple use of color captures that moment so well.

If your daily life seems poor, do not blame it; blame yourself, tell yourself that you are not poet enough to call forth its riches. -Rainer Maria Rilke

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Although many artists like to say that their work speaks for itself, we usually have to talk about the work whether in an artist’s statement or at a show.  Someone is inevitably going to ask you, “Why do you like trees so much?” or “Why do you use red circles in your work? or even “Are you ok?  Your painting looks like you’re tormented” (yes, I did get that from a friend once!)  Anyway, wouldn’t it be nice to have an answer prepared so you don’t find yourself tongue tied?  But better than that, it’s good to have that conversation with yourself- figure out what symbols or themes appear in your work often and then find out what that means to you. 

Use your journal to get the thoughts out, brainstorm, figure out what it is that you are trying to say. You can use this exercise to help you write that dreaded artist statement. When you write your artist statement you want to be concise and not too wordy or convoluted. In your journal though, you can be wordy, have spelling errors, awkward syntax and even incomplete sentences. This is about getting it out in the first place. Exploration before the execution.

Great art is the outward expression of an inner life in the artist. ~Edward Hopper

+This is a big one: look at your life, yes, at you, at who you are. What moves you? What issues do you find yourself gravitating towards? Are there certain themes or events in your life that have had a impacts on the way you think or behave? Do you have a life philosophy? Write these out in list form. You can go back later and dedicate a journal entry to each one.

+If certain themes or a general feeling appears in your work, write it down. List form. Go back and pick out areas to write about. How does this theme in your work reflect areas of your life, your own personal history? After all, we create what we know. Where could these themes be originating from and why? Or maybe we are creating what we don’t know, what we wish for….

+Make a list of the symbols, figures, shapes that appear or that you are drawn to.  For each one, list what they could possibly mean. Or if not a meaning, how does it make you feel?  Once you have a list, you may find themes.  Themes can always lead to a series…….

+Write about the colors that you are drawn to.  Why do you always pick up that Paynes Gray?  Colors have a whole psychology to them.  Look it up, put it in your journal. Here are a few links to start with:
:: http://psychology.about.com/od/sensationandperception/a/colorpsych.htm
:: http://www.squidoo.com/colorexpert

+So you like to paint a bowl of fruit and really there is no reason or symbolism behind that, that’s great too! This is still a good exercise to do to help with the artist statement or the gallery chat. If you think about it, of all the things in the world to paint, you are choosing fruit. Why? Maybe you just love to paint and the organic forms and the vivid colors allow you to explore paint and all its wonderful qualities. Writing about what motivates you helps clarify why you do what you do.

It might feel awkward to dissect your own work like that, but we are visual communicators.  Even if you think there is no meaning to the dots you placed in the lower right corner, something compelled you to do so.  Find out if there is a deeper meaning or maybe you will find that you are guided by something else, something more intuitive, or more experimental.  Finding this out is valuable and can only enrich your work.

++These tips may also help if you are feeling stuck or blocked with your work.  Figuring out what you are drawn to and what symbols or colors can help jumpstart ideas.

Some of the pictures are truly mysterious to me…which is why I so often say publicly that I don’t know or don’t care what they’re really about. And yet I can also say that the paintings are prayers. ~ Susan Rothenberg

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Continuing with the visual journaling theme this week and looking at your journal as a place to experiment. If you are a painter or a visual artist of some kind, a journal can be a very useful tool in housing ideas, generating ideas, and just letting yourself to let go.

It seems to be a psychological thing because a canvas is something that will be up on a wall. Or to be submitted for a show or added to a body of work. Pressure! But my journal is for me, not a finished piece of artwork. Not anything that anyone is going to see, unless I feel like sharing.  It can be ugly, it can be messy. Or it can turn out a new discovery.

It actually helps me to keep visual journal entries along side written entries.  Along side grocery lists.  Along side a photo of my son and an entry about something funny he did.  It helps me to keep things loose.  Less precious.  Less sacred.  If I had a book solely dedicated to amazing visual journal pages, I probably wouldn’t use it!  Or I’d be a little less risky.  And this type of visual journaling is all about experimenting.

Mixed media artist Amber Gibbs often uses her journal to experiment with different collage techniques.  She discusses these experiments on her blog, which is very helpful to see how to loosen up and play.

journal spread by Amber Gibbs

:: So, you don’t collage? Well then slap down some images on your pages.

:: You’ve never used your own photos in your work?  Here’s your chance.

:: Drawing a face freaks you out?  Draw a face and write all around the head like a halo.

:: You only use colors like Paynes Gray and Burnt Umber in your paintings?  Do a spread using Hansa Yellow and Napthol Red.

:: Use up your stash of odd bits of different textured paper.

:: Instead of using glue to attach images or paper, explore different methods of attachment- staples, eyelets, needle and thread, etc.

:: Try different mark making tools for your writing- graphite, conte, charcoal, ink and nib, white-out pens, gel pens, crayons and watercolor to create a wax-resist, etc. etc. etc.

a visual journal spread in my 2007-2008 journal

My son was born in 2007, so my time in the studio went from full time to any time I could get! When I came to the studio to work, I always started with visual journal page. It was a way to just get the creative juices flowing. An exercise to experiment with no pressure visually as well as a place to write my intentions for that day down. The page above was one of these studio morning pages. Several weeks later, I was working on an encaustic painting and trying to figure out a composition….when I remembered this page I had created. I went to my journal and looked up this page and I knew what direction to go in for that encaustic painting.

Use your journal to try new things out and create without pressure. Creating visual journal pages in this way can loosen you up and create new possibilities for you and your art.

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This mixed media and collage journal is now available at the amanobooks.com shop. I’m thinking that a collection of square journals with little birds is in the making….

Hold Fast to Dreams
blank journal, 6×6 inches

Hold fast to dreams
For if dreams die
Life is a broken-winged bird
That cannot fly…

~Langston Hughs

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Back by popular demand, amanobooks wine journals are back. But even better than that, they are now in the Clearance Section of the amanobooks shop.

When the wine journal is open, the right side is dedicated to recording the details of the wine that you would like to remember. Included are:

Type of Wine
Producer
Growing Area
Vintage
Date of Tasting
Sight
Sniff
Sip
Summary

inside right page

On the left side (not shown) is a blank page with enough room to glue down the wine label. Or even a tasting menu or any other information you would like to keep.

Wine Journals measure 7 1/4 x 8 inches and contains 130 pages, enough for 64 wine entries. I have made a limited number of these journals and once these journals are gone, they are gone! So get them now while you can.

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